The Unknown Lies Within the Walls
BEFORE THE POEM..THERE ARE TWO ENDINGS...I AM JUS PUTTING BOTH ENDINGS ON HERE SO AFTER THE FOURTH QUATRAIN IS THE SECOND ENDING
the handprints on her walls
the bruises on her face
he threw her down the hall
and whispered she's a disgrace
he can't control his anger
he can control his aim
another round gets fired;
another life gone down the drain
blood stains on the ceiling
her heart continues beating
so he loads the gun once again
and watches her stop breathing
her innocent life taken
his heartless soul remains
he gave out one last chuckle
as he too went down the drain
------OR---------
her innocent life taken
her father still alive
he pulle dthe trigger back once mroe
but couldn't take his life
Copyright © 2008 Lyndzie Garro. All rights reserved
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The Unknown Lies Within The Walls
Good piece, I enjoyed the flow and darkness of this, and a choice of endings! Great idea to let the reader see both, for me, I prefer the second choice. Look forward to seeing more from you,
Dave
I Really like this one...
Great choice of story telling words and flow...and as are you, I can't really say which ending I like better...keep writing. Amy
good read
You painted a vivid picture with your choice of words and just as david pointed out I like the choice in endings,good stuff...keep up the good work!Ricklovin
I agree completely
The second ending is best. This is an excellent poem.