She beckoned me imperiously
From where she sat alone
And I, for fear of life and limb
Acceded to her summon
“I learn you write fine verse”
She said, and I did assent
“Then sit and let us talk” she said
“Of happenings and great events”

She said “Leave that rabble
If you really want to learn”
So I left my philistine pals
And ladies, luscious and lissome
For I was enamoured, instantly
With her wit and social weight
It mattered not that I was slight
And she was twelve stone eight.

We conversed all that night long
And all the more I fell
As her Dorothy Parker repartee
Cast its magic spell
I ascended to a different level
Indeed, a much higher plane
From where I looked at earthly pals
In intellectual disdain

From then on, I pursued her
For pearls that fell from her lips
Blind to nubile, neophyte nymphs
And sensuous, svelte sylphs
My pals warned “She’s endowed
And you - not all nine stone
In a bonk, please do take care
Of your pelvic bone”

But to reach her level
I had to be celibate
It was tough to beat the devil
And remain in that state
So we stayed at arms length
Not for my pelvis health
I was seeking my degree
And intellectual wealth

Thankfully my term was ended
When I asked her this question
Where she got her satisfaction
And she said “Your mate Big Ben”
I immediately flunked that class
And descended back to earth
And found myself a comely lass
Thank you Ben, for my re-birth!

Dolan Fernandes
July, 2008