I live moment to moment
With a vice grip on my heart
I fight a constant battle
Against the tears that long to fall
You'll never know
How much this tears me up
I have loved you so very, very much
I have longed and ached for your touch
It wasn't always that way
You see
In the beginning it was fun
To laugh, to flirt, to tell jokes
To tease and be teased
But somewhere along the way
It began to matter to me
I hung onto your words
They were the air I would breathe
I dreamt of you at night
I sought you during the day
You remained illusive
Unaffected
Distant
My heart came to need you
More, so much more
Than I could express
And when I said it
You turned and walked away
You cut me off, no warning
Never before have I suffered
Like this
You have killed me
And yet
I am still breathing
How can this be?