it's difficult to examine
the turn my life has taken.
married with children;
love for my husband forsaken.

i search for reciprocal love
at whatever the cost.
along with the person i desire,
my dignity too, has been lost!

in the blink of an eye
i morphed from mother and wife;
to a person i didn't recognize
leading an intoxicated life.

my persona changed drastically
you can ask anyone i know;
i busted out of my shell
and moved forward gung-ho!

on a night i wasn't looking
i met the man of my dreams;
when i see or think about him
my entire body gleams.

our early days together
we traveled a bumpy road;
but over the last couple months
it has more smoothly flowed.

we've enjoyed nights out
walks, ice cream and fires;
it seemed like all was well
until i told him my desires.

i said the dreaded "i love you"
crossing a line i didn't know existed;
he looked like i tried to gut him alive
or something more twisted!

i didn't know feelings of affection
were an awful thing to bestow
on someone you care for;
but i guess it can be a death-blow.

was i living a fantasy
that was only in my mind?
is it really possible
that i could have been that blind?

well he put on quite and act
and had me absolutely fooled;
a lesson of hard knocks
i have been duly schooled.

i get sick to my stomach
losing pound after pound;
i can't fathom the idea
that he won't be around.

i hope he reconsiders
what he is letting go.
something people search a lifetime for
and aren't always lucky enough to know!