Smoke
One day,
After an eternity of growing,
My desire, raw and strong as a newly
Budded flower, burst
From the tender soil of my soul.
I etched
The words, ever so carefully,
On a piece of parchment, as if
Set in stone.
My quill dancing softly across the page,
Spinning, sloping, scratching,
Spelt the words I’d longed to pour:
I love you.
Shocked, I tore up the parchment;
Tossing the pieces
into the grate, I watched the fire
Lick at the page,
Charcoal edges curling up like satisfied grins.
The hearth has consumed my words, but
On my face, the truth is written
Clearer than a note untouched by smoke:
I love you.
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Smoke
oldaspirationsneverdie...7
This is a wonderful poem with magnficent imagery! It is unusual and the
beauty of your words describe an inner conflict which is felt by many
poets: We attempt to write "truths!" The birth and creation of a
poem is to satisfy that conflict and bring a resolution to our spiritual
demands, and as the words of your last line lingers in my mind: "Clearer
than a note untouched by smoke: I love you." Your imagery is
very vivid and original!
Hi Epitome,
I think this poem is most beautiful. Your wording is wonderful and so meaningful. An excellent poem you should be proud of. Well done and keep your pen flowing.
Angel.
We just love poetry
POETRY AND FRIENDS FUN GROUP
smoke
This poem flowed beautifully. Has anyone told you, you have something there? I don't normally 'big' people up. but credit where credits due.
WELL DONE
Deborah
thanks all
coming from such poets (and I don't mean to big you up either), those comments do mean a lot to me. I thank you all.
god damn I love it
My quill dancing softly across the page,
Spinning, sloping, scratching
Those words are so contrasting, that it describes the mixed, confused, and tortured emotions coming from the speaker. The flower analogy makes no sense when first read, but then once read after the poem has ended, it makes perfect and beautiful sense. The charcoal edges curling up like satisfied grins just shows how cynical you are at the world. Even the fire is mocking you! And still yet the last two lines are the most beautiful. VERY well done.