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The Separation Tour

Posted May 29th, 2008 by joyce

I saw the mailman
As my soldier's courier,
Bringing me his love.
My husband was unfaithful
And the news came in the mail.

© 2008 Joyce Greene (All rights reserved)

great contrast

On May 30th, 2008 msalmon says:

Here is an example of the two halves of a tanka being completely different and yet joining together perfectly in the end. Your title is perfect too!

thanks, ms

On May 30th, 2008 joyce says:

Thank you for your nice comment. A tanka is a challenging art form but very satisfying when it works! Thanks for taking the time to read and comment.

joyce

One Big Comment

On May 30th, 2008 ErgoIgoUgo2 says:

Having gone through and read a good many of your pieces I would have to surmise that power minimalism is your strength. Get it there and punch em in the face, get their attention, make your point and get outta Dodge. Personally, I tend to be far too verbose to even attempt much of this type of writing. I will continue to read your works because they did their job...they got my attention.

Write on,

Pete

thanks, pete

On May 31st, 2008 joyce says:

I actually printed your comment for future reading pleasure! Thanks so much. I was brought up to fear being considered wordy, so when I discovered this form, thanks to David Gibbs, I really got into it fast. It allows me to structure my poems and say what I want fast!

Thanks for reading and commenting!

joyce

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