Years now
I have smeared myself with
Letter from famous men/woman
Such as Donald Trump/Bill Clinton
The late Pope Paul...
I asked Trump if he could see his way
Clear to send me a hand-out, say a few
Hundered dollars, he replied by saying
'You have obvious talent in your fingers.' !!
To Bill and Hilary Clinton I sent an
Encouraging humorous poem that most men
Have been caught with their pants down at some
Point in their lives. And to the late Pope Paul
I made mention of his visit to New Zealand and his
Reception in the City park where we as a band of
Poverty- stricken human wreckage was
Herded out of it by the Police. His Holiness replied
Much to my surprise with blessings in the Lord
JESUS cHRIST, I recall the postie who delivered
The letter with the papal seal, 'Look', she said, 'do
You think I could have the envelope, I am a Catholic'
Hold on I said I will read to you His Holiness'reply
And of course you can have the envelope.
I had been working past countless midnights
Winging off letters to all and sundry, on my knees
Before a cracked statuette of a Saint which I bought
In Italy many moons back. There I was mouthing all
Manner of incantations hoping for some transformation
Of mind an character. I believed I could see the future
With my Alladdin-lamp-shaped head,, and could
Populate solitude with magic in anything I wished. Alas
I found I had shrunk nearly six inches and two strange
Lumps sprung up behind my left ear. I told
A blood- brother ever concerned about my mental health
That these two lumps was,I felt certain, two volumes of
A Pear's encyclopedia, he replied immediately with the
Suggestion it was a double hernia, I informed him that
That ailment usually fell in the area of a man's bollocks
Well....he said, with a long pause. By the way, he continued
Totally ignoring my comment, whats that huge hole outside
Your window underneath the street lamp?
Last night, I replied, I tied up the full moon to the street-lamp
Which had,would you believe,fallen into the street a little after
Midnight. He left almost at once to make an phone-call
And had the audacity to send two men in white coats to my place
I thought the were ice-cream vendors,they alongwith the
Local city council, and the local police suggested I find
Some other abode. I know what you are thinking,here is another
Fanciful fictionary tale by a potential mental candidate for
Funny Farm, what saved me? Why the letters from the Pope
Trump and the then President Clinton....
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