Want To Know What Hell Is
Want to know what hell is
Let me tell you all about hell
Once you get a wind of it
To others, you must tell.
Hell is an ultimate villain
A vibrate overcomer with hate
Hell is an energetic housekeeper
Who consistently locks the gate.
Hell is a referee
Whose calls are never right
Hell is an outlaw
Whose taste is worse than its bite.
Hell is a sarcastic bullet
Whose guidelines are never clear
Hell is a swinging blade
A cut that's so severe.
Hell is one of those things
Even life try to avoid
Hell is a repulsive aphrodisiac
Even temptation try to disregard.
Hell is the dark vador
It's scars not only by sight
Hell is a cookie crumbled with
Vinegar as its main delight.
Now you know what hell is
Atleast you have a clue
If you get a taste of it
I truly feel sorry for you.
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hmmm
"Hell is one of those things
Even life tries to avoid
Hell is a repulsive aphrodisiac
Even temptation disregards."
This makes s grammatical and makes the rhythm better. I am all about rhythm. It is a nice attempt, but maybe preachy? I dunno, just my opinion. Otherwise I do like the description of so many dark things.
Well, my attempt was to
Well, my attempt was to teach not preach, but preaching works if it aids in changing lives. Thats my real goal with my writing. Glad you took the time to read. Thanks for the comment.
PERFECTION!PERSONIFIED!
THIS IS FROM THE MIND AND HEART OF A TRUE POET IN EVERY SENSE OF THE WORDS.BRAVO AND AS WE SAY IN SCOTIA,JIG THEM WORDS UP!IN OTHER WORDS SING THEM OUT FOR ALL TO HEAR!YOU R AN UNFOUND GEM AND NOW YOUR SPARKLE HAS PEEKED THRU AND GROWS WITH EVERY STROKE OF YOUR MIGHTY PEN.MORE MORE AND MORE.AS IM A GREEDY WEE CU..!FOR GOOD FREE STUFF LOL!MISERABLE SCOTS GIT!THANK YOU FOR THE PLEASSURE OF FINDING YOUR WORDS.I BOW TO YOU.
Don't bow, I'm not worthy.
Don't bow, I'm not worthy. Just advocate what hell is with the attempt to strike fear in the lives of all. Thanks for the comment.
Hell is differant to
Hell is differant to differant people,but of course it is always bad,from the simple to the important,Life is short,but hell can make it longer,take it from a lost soul trying to find his way....I think bringing it to the forefront that hell encompasses both the mondane and the things that are important shows letting it take control of the un-important will allow it to take over the important,these people who "grade' poems on their merit along and how it flows along are missing the point,a poem is meant to deliver a message,rather that is seen or not is whats important,I like your poems-Lee
Spoken like a real poet.
Spoken like a real poet. Thanks for seeing the meaning and not the style. Thanks for the comment.