TORTURED SOUL!
Life's a bitch and then you die or so the adage goes...
unless you're me it just goes on suffering from head to toe.
The happiness, it never lasts, there's always some more strife....
but yet I must continue on to live this ugly life.
My family has helped me through but also caused me pain...
why must I strive to do good things when everything's in vain?
We've laughed and cried, joked and screamed, yet some things stay the same...
it makes me question many things, is it real or just a game?
I do my best to make it through another day of hell...
my spirit bloody, scarred, and bruised from all the times I fell.
But something deep inside of me, keeps me pressing ever on....
even when I want to quit and dread the coming dawn.
Another day "oh great, oh joy" I get to struggle more...
I wonder what's the next new thing that my life has in store?
I have some friends, both old and new, I love and cherish them...
because without support and love, my life would surely end.
Can you imagine fighting, for survival everyday?
not just all the little things, but a reason just to stay!
My heart, it aches, my mind, on edge, it's a wonder I'm still sane...
Please tell me why you chose me God to live my life this way?
"God have you forsaken me? Have I been too bad to love"?....
What can I do, I need to know to reach you up above?
Why must life be filled with hate, confusion, and ugly things?
Perhaps so we will recognize, the good things that you bring.
What happens when the good things never seem to come too near?
Please tell me Lord for I grow weak, the fight is gone I fear!
Battled tested, strong no doubt, a rock to those I know...
a side of me that no one sees, how deep my sorrow goes.
My soul is lost, my purpose gone, how can I cry for help?
I do not know what I can do to even help myself!
A new day comes, and then it starts, the tears begin to flow...
despair sets in from realizing, that my LIFE is my foe!
Why can't I just be happy and find peace along my path?
Why does this darkness cover me like water from a bath?
Why is the pain so strong for some, yet little for a few?
These are the questions that I ask, and now I pose to you.